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February 18th, 2017

12:53 am - Oh Yeah. Fourth Meditation Iteration
I've incorporated a bit of "The Fire Mist Meditation" from Nicki Scully's "Alchemical Healing", but overall the process is still mostly my own. So...

Part 1 - Drawing the Light Down

  1. Visualize light from the cosmos gathering above your head. When it feels like it's gained the right brightness and intensity, draw down a straight beam of it into the 7th chakra, where it again swirls and builds.

  2. When it has gained enough, either speak aloud or silently think "My light is divine light. My spirit is divine spirit"

  3. The light comes down to the six chakra. Once again, when it's gained enough strength speak or think "My mind is divine mind. My thoughts are divine thoughts."

  4. For the fifth chakra "My voice is divine voice. My words are divine words."

  5. For the fourth chakra "My heart is divine heart. My love is divine love."

  6. For the third chakra "My will is divine will."

  7. For the second chakra "My creation is divine creation."

  8. For the first chakra "My life is divine life."

Note: For the wording, I tried to make it so that there's no separation between us and the divine. It's a tricky wording, but true. The divine and we are truly one.

Part 2 - Bringing the Earth Energy Up (Fire Mist integration)

    Now the energy continues to descend, down...down...down still further till it reaches the very center of the earth, that hot, glowing core. Once it touches that spot, it begins to rise back up the path we traced down.
  1. It builds once it hits the first chakra, nourishing, expanding, strengthening the work the divine light has begun. Once you feel a good point has been reached, speak or think "I live as the divine."

  2. The energy rises again, to the second chakra, and once again nourishing, expanding, strengthening and stabilizing the work begun. Speak or think "I create as the Divine."

  3. At the third chakra "I will as the divine."

  4. At the fourth chakra "I love as the divine."

  5. At the fifth chakra "I express as the divine."

  6. At the sixth chakra "I think as the divine."

  7. At the seventh chakra "I illuminate as the divine."

  8. The light then erupts out the crown, raining down onto you, and from the palms of your hands, even your fingertips. I always see it as hot lava, ready to fertilize and build, bring whatever's necessary to where it's needed. Think loudly that one word of healing only you know.

Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 12th, 2017

12:23 am - Review by the Grouch.
Tonight's subject - the movie "La La Land"

I dunno. It seemed like kind of a mess to me. One telling comment made towards the beginning about a combination samba/tapas place. "This place worships everything, and values nothing." That's kinda how the film seemed to me. The scope simply was too large and tried to stuff too much into what time it did have. Even though Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling were perfectly cast for their roles, they couldn't lift the mess of a plot out of the mire it found itself lodged in.

That, and the ending just made me at first go "Well, ya makes yer choices and ya takes yer lumps." I'm sure lots would have been disappointed in the ending, but for me it was like "Yeah, sometimes in pursuing your dreams you pay a price. It's not always sweetness and light."
Current Location: McMInnville, OR
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 11th, 2017

05:18 pm - Owwwww
How lovely. Dropped a log on my bare foot last night. Fortunately it's far less painful than it looks. One toe's pretty much turned purple. There's some stiffness, but really no pain now. Whew.
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 7th, 2017

07:41 pm - It works for now.
Ugh. Because I can't get this Soundblaster card to work in Linux, I simply...removed it, and reverted to using the built in sound on the motherboard. Not terribly happy about it, but it seems to work for now at least. Though I'm eventually planning to hook up the mixing board to this machine and use it to convert all our master tapes to MP3's to avoid any further degradation. It's also a question of where to set up? Now I'm thinking I may have to take it to the outbuilding and set up in the upper level there. It's not being used really, so why not.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 5th, 2017

11:01 pm - The Proverbial electronic Whack-A-Mole
Yes you guessed it, friends. Okay, bought another monitor from Goodwill, and hooked it up to the i7 since I have much less trepidation over this box than the A10. I'm not getting another monitor till I replace the video card in that thing. Good news is a new replacement for me is only about $40 plus shipping. I can handle this. I'll probably get it from Tiger Direct. Then another Goodwill monitor.

However while on my way to La La Land over this, I went out to the truck late this afternoon...to find the APU had died. It won't even start. It just throws the ol' enG error up on this display without even trying. It could just be a blown fuse, or any number of things. So in the panic of the moment I braved a downpour in just my jacket to quickly disconnect the batteries before they all went dead. Something is definitely draining them, and I have no idea what at this point.

So this means a visit to both Hofrichter's and Thermo King. I could look things over tomorrow, but even if it is nothing more than a fuse the APU still needs a servicing simply because we've been running it so much.

Actually I probably won't be looking it over, for there's much financial discussion, as well as putting away the Christmas ornaments. Argh.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
Current Music: The sound of teeth grinding

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 3rd, 2017

11:19 pm - But wait! There's more!
Oh joy. Now the OTHER monitor's dead as well. So I've got no monitor working at...all. At least I've got the laptops so I'm not totally dead.

So this ups the suspicion to the video card. Maybe it's sending some kind of spike and killing the monitors. Strange that this one was off when it happened. I dunno. But even so the card was doing acting kinda funny even when I bought it used. It was making traveling artifacts, which I suppose is a symptom of faulty memory. The A10 does have built in video on the motherboard, so I can use that while I shop around for another card as well. Though this means I now need two monitors. Oy.

In better news, I thought the touchpad on the Toshiba P775 had died. Turns out, it just needed cleaning off. Works okay now.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: irritatedirritated

(Look me in the eyes...)

February 2nd, 2017

10:10 pm - What a Nice thing to come home to.
I boot up the A10, or try to anyway, and the monitor's not showing anything.

Yes. It's dead, and rather suddenly too. It gave NO signs at all. It was working perfectly when we left. So now I'm left with this other monitor I bought at Goodwill which is probably on its last legs as well, due to the fact that when it's on I smell hot plastic. So time to get another monitor, pronto. For the moment my budget says another Goodwill special, since that's all I have money for.

Though it IS nice we got home when we actually planned to, without major weather delays. Did get held up for a couple hours by high winds through WY, and another couple of hours due to snow starting at Ontario, OR. But once it stopped, we managed to squeak through. And just in time. Tomorrow's forecast is for rain and freezing rain. Fun.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 29th, 2017

02:49 pm - Right.
Okay, so the mate says for me to give a list of my own strengths and weaknesses.

Strengths. Oh, you mean those gifts that the world's made plain enough it doesn't want?

Weaknesses. Oh, you mean like...everything?
Current Location: Somewhere.
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 28th, 2017

09:52 pm - Arrrrrrrrgh.
Okay. Well I turned in the old set of LED lights where one had broken, and graciously was provided a second, newer set at no charge since the first were still under warranty. I try and install them and...There's a plastic collar that the wire clip on the socket is supposed to fit around, only it doesn't. There's a mark where it seems a groove was to be cut, but it never did and so the clip won't fit down far enough to latch. Oy.

The incandescent ones I'm still using work okay, but aren't as bright.

Then there's the matter of still needing to replace the RJ45 jack on the cord connected to the ScanGauge to get the lighting to work again. I also bought another power strip to plug into the inverter, but I don't know if the 3ft cord will be long enough to run it where I want. I can always plug the strip into the yellow extension cord and it'll temporarily work till I get home and can retrieve the power strip I normally use.
Current Location: Oak Grove, MO
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 26th, 2017

04:36 pm - Still on a Plateau.
Whoa. Six days since I posted anything. Now I'm caught out east in Pennsylvania. I've checked all the east/west interstates from I80 in the north down to I64 in the south. ALL of them will be snowed in over the next few days. Holy Moses. So, not much else to do other than wait it out. At least our settlement came in, and we'll divvy it up tomorrow. Actually I could do that tonight since we won't be rolling before midnight, so the mileage on the truck now will be the same as at that time. That can be entered into the budget, which will produce a number of miles to calculate how much to put into the maintenance fund. We need it, for this truck needs a new driver's seat.
Current Location: Carlisle, PA
Current Mood: gruff

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 20th, 2017

06:52 pm - I don't know why
This has been one of those times where I've actually been resistant to posting anything in this journal. I'm obviously fighting through this now, typing these few words out, but everything...seems to have hit a plateau. It's all the same thing, day after day after day. Get up, drive, work some more, collapse, rinse, repeat.

At least I have started yet another drawing, even though there's so many other works that still need finishing. It would be nice to like actually...wrap something up? I've been an odd mixture of both listless and restless.
Current Location: Columbus, OH
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 13th, 2017

03:36 pm - Suspicion
Is happiness really related to productivity? I'm doubting this.
Current Location: Auburn, WA
Current Mood: crankycranky

(2 dead knights | Look me in the eyes...)

January 11th, 2017

11:32 pm - Trying to remain upbeat
Okay, had a third session today. In it, I drew out a map with four quadrants on a basic 8.5 by 11 inch paper, used in landscape orientation. Top half deals with sensory experience, or behaviors. That's what I gleaned out of it anyway. Bottom half deals with motivations, values and blockages. The left side is what one moves away from, and the right side what one moves towards. Bottom left? Yeah. Everything I listed is a potential symptom of ADHD. Just needs the right context. In the center, there's a circle marked "Notice with compassion".

Suffering. It's what I do so well. More on this in a future post. I'm trying to concentrate on what I've learned, to concentrate on who or what matters to me the most, values in other words. It's all part of the human experience.

Though at this point, I still want "Okay, NOW can I relax?" as my epitaph.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: tiredtired

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 6th, 2017

12:35 am - And...yeah.
We've had a couple of sessions with a therapist, and I'm learning a good bit about my own (le sigh) adult ADHD. One tool to keep myself on track I've found in my wanderings is Kanbanflow.com. It's nice in that it starts out with four columns, To do, to do today, IN PROCESS, and DONE(Emphasis mine). Basically it's to have no more than three tasks in process at any given time. I actually did pretty well with it for the first day. Still didn't get everything I wanted done, but it's not that bad. Still need to do finances and shopping tomorrow.

Oh, speaking of which, the Borg Printer as I call it (HP 8250) has bitten the dust. I've looked on Amazon for exact replacements, and I can either pick up a used one for around $145, or just head down first to Goodwill and possibly find a good one for about $20, and failing that pick up a new one across the street at Staples for about $90. We never printed that many photos and could use a printer on the Ubuntu network other than the Canon, which supposedly writes really crappy drivers for Linux. This seems to be rather borne out by experience, as I've had trouble printing on the Canon from across the network. In Winduhs it works just fine.

Speaking of which, it looks like I'll be loading this year's Turbotax onto the P.O.S AMD A6 running Win10 at a snail's pace. Win7 on the Lenovo just won't update. It sits there and sits there and sits there looking for updates. I've tried resetting things to no avail. So! I suppose I could take this unregistered copy of Win8 previously owned but not used by my now deceased mother-in-law and start over on that machine, but I really don't want to rebuild it yet again, and then have to repeat the process once I finally DO buy an honest to goodness replacement for it, and THEN have to seek out some flavor of Winduhs to put on it. Best just to save it. Verily.

Now, it's also quite ridiculous to try and take FOUR laptops on the road. Three max. So who stays this time? Both Toshiba's(i7 and A6) go with. I'm thinking because of its fragility I'm leaving the Lenovo here this time. So the backup will be wee little Bes, the HP with a 14 inch screen.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: tiredtired

(Look me in the eyes...)

January 2nd, 2017

02:14 pm - So how DID it all go, anyway?
Yeah I know most of the time it feels like too much work for too little pleasure, but all in all I do think this was one of the more memorable and enjoyable New Year's I've had in a long time. We had live entertainment this year, all our own! We only paid for two hours, but I swear he went on for more like four. So yay! John English "The Voice" of Frank Sinatra. I'm more than pleased towards the end he sang that one song I'll have to look up. Please stand by.

Got it. Frank Sinatra - One For My Baby(And One More For the Road)

I myself had two wardrobe changes during all this. First was just black jeans and shirt for a group meditation based on Nikki Scully's "Planetary Healing" with the mate reading and singing the vocal parts. After that, the eating, drinking, and making merry started, and the music started. Well, it's Frank, so what do YOU expect I'd wear? Yup. My black suit and a fedora, looking like a hood from Philly. HA! Third was donning my black robe and cloak to come out as the old year going away. Get outta here, 2016. Your time is done.

So. Fun! Pics might be forthcoming as they arrive. My friends took way more than I did, since I was so flipping busy throughout. But it's done now. Only cleanup remains.
Current Location: Chris Squire's version of "Amazing Grace"

(Look me in the eyes...)

10:54 am - In those 48 hours or so.
Got...most of the stuff on the list done. So now it's 2017. Big, fat, hairy deal. The biggest thing planned for this year is changing carriers at the beginning of April. If we execute it as planned and hoped for, it'll make a HUGE difference and take a lot of financial pressure off.

But, we'll also start it off with brand new stairs to the upper level of the outbuilding. The damn thing's nowhere near code since it was almost all DIY, and...le sigh. Two boards on the back deck have collapsed. Yeah, that thing needs redoing as well.

Just to add to the mood, "New Year's Day" hasn't lost a single iota of relevance since it's release 34 years ago. Nothing changes on New Year's Day.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: listlesslistless
Current Music: U2 - New Year's Day

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 29th, 2016

12:59 pm - Quick Note to Self
After New Year's, I'll need to pick up all new printer cartridges for the Borg printer (HP 8250). That's what I call it, since it has some many daggone lights and displays on it. Expired ink. Right. Just another way to grab more money out of your wallet. So I might as well travel over to Staples while I'm in the area and at least price them out. I'm estimating $20 per color cartridge, and $30 for the black ink, which makes the total $130. Yeeeesh.

Also the list is drawn up for the New Year's party and once again it looks like five people would have trouble completing it in the given time, never mind only two. Here's the list as I see it. Are you ready?Collapse )

What? Me stressed? Noooooooo...couldn't be.

Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: stressedstressed

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 28th, 2016

10:08 pm - For the rest of today.
There's still plenty left, but here's what happened.

Rats. As it turns out, the front light is out because of the connection underground, not the bulb. I MAY be able to dig it up and get it reconnected. Stress MAY. 120VAC is not my favorite thing to deal with and these lights probably didn't take cold, damp climates into account when they were designed.

I got most of one box of papers cleared out. The vast majority did turn into recycling of one kind or another. Still have the front room to deal with though.

And...while I was busy putting up the lights I knocked over the Sekhmet statue that's already broken two or three times, and bink...off come the feet again. And one of the dragons broke off an earfin. So...epoxy to the rescue once more, and as an added bonus I glued back the ornament of the USS Kelvin from the JJ Abrams reboot of Star Trek.

But like I said, still so much left. Arrrrrrgh. AND I'm supposed to be in on practicing music for the meditation late Saturday afternoon. Good luck there.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: stressedstressed

(Look me in the eyes...)

01:47 pm - And today
Well let's see. The C7 lights are up. Good. Oil sample is also taken and ready to be shipped. Also good.

Now would someone tell me why LJ keeps screwing up. None of the links on the editing page to change things work, and no friend's feed, and no suggestions pop up either. For pity's sake.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated

(Look me in the eyes...)

11:08 am - And now for Oopses, small, big, and small.
Well...the HP G7 arrived a few days ago. It IS an i7 CPU...and a 14 inch screen.


Nevertheless, I went ahead and loaded Ubuntu 16.04 onto it. It works just fine, it's just...so wee little! It's like having a full function tablet in my hands.

Anyway, I was also breaking out the spare C7 lights and opened what I thought was a pack of red lights. Turns out, no they're amber which I've already bought a box of 25. So I have lots and lots of amber, and no red. Oy. Time to Amazon it.

EDIT: Also now I find it's time to get an oil sample, which means running the engine, which means...hooking the batteries back up AFTER disconnecting them once already. ACH.
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: Oy.
Tags: ,

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 27th, 2016

01:20 pm - Now it's time to get busy once more. Fun...
Yes, once again there's a whole farking list of things to do before the truck gets back on the road. Though here I need to separate it into two categories, before New Years, and after New Years.

Before New Years

  • Go through the last of the papers in the front room. Most of it's probably recycling by now anyway. That room's almost done. Whoot!

  • Hang up the C7 lights inside around the large picture window in front.

  • Hang up the netting lights outside over the front shrubbery.(No knights who say NI though.)

  • Find out why one outside light's not working. I'm REALLY hoping it's just a burned out bulb and not the underground connection came loose...yet again.

  • Get four more batches of cookies out.

After New Years

  • Take oil sample from truck and send in. If all else goes well, I'll try and sneak this in before New Year's because we need to know the results pronto.

  • Depending on results of oil sample, either schedule an oil change or just a filter change at Hofrichter's.

  • Also, change out FASS filters. The motor sounds like it's starting to labor, a sign that it's time to do that.

  • Get down the the McCoy Freightliner at Brooks, OR, and first pick up the drain tube I ordered back in October. While I'm there, see about picking up an oil sender as well. That might help with oil pressure AND engine braking performance.

  • ALSO while I'm there, see about getting a replacement LED headlight, since the current one is dead and should still be under warranty. Just got to find the paperwork, which I think is in the outbuilding.

  • Of course, clean out the truck and get it ready to get back on the road for appox 4.5 weeks. Eeeesh.

Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 24th, 2016

11:37 am - Now HERE's an Early Christmas Present!
You know how I'd once talked about getting a second FIOS router for the home? I found one that looked like it would work over at Goodwill, for a whooping $6.99. Yes you read that right. SEVEN DOLLARS. Whoot! It even had it's own AC adapter, which is a BIG plus. Lotsa them at Goodwill are often without, leaving you to find one somewhere. Goodwill may or may not have it. Usually they don't. So I did plug it in at the store, and everything that was supposed to light up, did. So far, so good!

So this morning at the other end of the house I set it up with a laptop plugged into it via ethernet. I downloaded a manual on its operation, and did a factory reset by holding in that button for ten seconds. Then logged into All's good there. Used the default username and password, and immediately changed both. Then it was on to configuring the Wifi as I wanted. WPA2 security, good. Changed the hotspot name and made it hidden. Good. Then I tried to connect to it, and use the internet. All good!

So yay! AND the HP G7's here, and I still need to get it set up. I'm too much of a coward to try and swap out it's 320gig drive and the A6's 1T, since the A6 is running Win10. If both were running Ubuntu, no problem. But they're not. It's no biggie though. I'll just save up $80 and buy a 1T Western Digital drive when the time comes.

Now, with the mate getting ready to go out grocery shopping, I'm going to take this alone time to wrap up her presents. Shhhhhh...
Current Location: McMinnville, OR
Current Mood: ecstaticecstatic

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 20th, 2016

06:16 pm - So it all may really be pointless
But I actually did work on not one but two stories last night. One much more than the other. They both are still nowhere near finished, but it's something at least.
Current Location: Sidney, NE
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

December 17th, 2016

10:24 pm - Okay, it's been way too long.
The problem is what the hell can I add to the mix here that hasn't already been said. At least the solstice is coming up. We're on the last load before we go home. So hooray! But...as always there seems to be a catch, as it seems the entire northwestern US is snowed under and continues to be that way. We'll be TRYING to get through there most likely on Tuesday. And now it started thunderstorming here...weird.

Yeah, in fact any kind of writing's been hard to come by these days. I keep asking according to Kevin Rutherford what is my latest "hard work" and here it seems to be fiction writing at least. Of course there's plenty to work on, and so little will to do it. Arrrrrrgh.

It's all been "what's the point" now. Maybe there is no point, but who really cares? I've even related myself that good things seem to happen when I write, even things with no seeming direct connection to it. Soooo, what's the big hangup?
Current Location: Lebanon, TN
Current Mood: Efffffff

(2 dead knights | Look me in the eyes...)

December 1st, 2016

03:41 pm - The Second American Revolution.
Throughout history, the concentration of power has found it's home in three areas. I'm still refining the concepts here, but this is the basic outline.

The first was the church. Nation states had existed before this time of course, but their power and reach up until the time of the Catholic Church remained limited. One can even hear this precept echoed in The Three Musketeers, where Dartanian(sp?) is told "Take insults from no one except the king, or the cardinal. He rules through the king." The government received its right and ability to rule from its Deity.

Government itself was the second. This start of this can be most likely traced to the rule of King Henry VIII, when he broke from the Catholic Church to establish the Church of England, subject to his rule, rather than the other way around.

The culmination of this came around the rule of King Louis XIV, and his (translated) declaration of "I am the state." All power concentrated with one individual, pure and simple.

Then came the American Revolution, which removed the concentration of power from the halls of government. With its concept of separation of powers, it (theoretically at least) insured that no one individual or small group of individuals could wield absolute power over others. And in this the Constitution is extremely effective at defining and limiting the powers of those within the government.

Unfortunately the American Revolution did not eliminate the concentration of power, it merely displaced it from the halls of government to the halls of business. Capitalism as it stands now is minority rule, an elite few getting to decide what's best for all its members. It holds no permanent allegiance or tie to any nation or group outside of itself. This in itself is not inherently wrong or bad, but it does allow them to play nations off on one another.

Indeed, currently we may have our culmination of the concentration of power within the business world. Still, every zenith has its inevitable downfall. Smaller companies are experimenting with a leaderless business model, and this is good. We need the equivalent of the American Revolution here. Using government to limit the power of business really doesn't work, as we've seen. Whatever's done can also be undone.
Current Location: Perry, UT
Current Mood: busybusy

(Look me in the eyes...)

November 24th, 2016

02:06 pm - Just what AM I thankful for?
It's been hard to say. The past few days I've felt anything but. Fortunately today I managed to get on the meditation CD "Saraswati Dreams" and those chants certainly helped. Of course it also helps that I've associated a fairy with each of the eight chants.

Though what really snapped me out of it was playing John Mellencamp's "Little Pink Houses" while driving south on I65 in IN, which is his home state. I was like "God bless ya all. It doesn't matter what you believe. Bless you anyway." I'm sure the political views of the residents was different than mine, but it doesn't matter.

I am thankful the truck really has never seriously broken down on us. We've only had it towed twice, and one time wasn't the truck's fault. It's really only that one time in WY when a radiator hose blew. And that was only about 20 miles from the nearest repair shop. We've had some close calls of course, like when the FASS wasn't hooked up correctly, or when the belt tensioner seized and took the belt with it. Those times I managed to limp it into a repair service without towing.

I am thankful for two very cute kitties, even if Akeru did just destroy my fourth pair of earbuds.
Current Location: Lebanon Junction, KY
Current Mood: better

(Look me in the eyes...)

November 17th, 2016

04:51 pm - If you really want to know
How the US government will act in the next four years, study George W. Bush's first term 2001-2004. Everything outside of 9/11? That's what you'll get.
Current Location: Richfield, WI
Current Mood: disgusted

(Look me in the eyes...)

November 15th, 2016

08:52 pm - You know...
With all these polls broken down by category, age, gender, education, I never saw one poll broken down by income level. Classism still not dare be spoken here.
Current Location: Carlisle, PA
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

November 12th, 2016

04:15 pm - Congratulations America.
Enjoy your fascism. That is all.
Current Location: Oak Grove, MO
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

November 10th, 2016

03:03 pm - Everyone's Overreacting
I'm posting this in reply to this post, since it got too long and I had a lot I wanted to say.You have been warnedCollapse )
Current Location: Smithton, PA
Current Mood: crankycranky

(Look me in the eyes...)

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